Feeling the urge

I've been sober 11 months now, as do most in recovery I've my good n bad days. Lately, that need or want rather to drink has been in the back of my mind. I believe it to be stemming from the fact that 2 yrs ago I moved from my home state to be with my fiance of a year and things went south. It was around this time we got engaged. The loneliness is setting in.
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  • @Revdorsey Hello there. Welcome to The Forum. Congratulations on 11 months sober. That's wonderful! I'm sorry that your relationship ended, i'm sure that is challenging at times. I'm super glad that you're coming here for support, that can certainly help with your loneliness and feeling triggered.

    Do you have a support network that you are in touch with regularly? Just curious. Definitely know that we're here to encourage and support you however we can. I know we can get wrapped up in our thought life concerning the past, but try not to stay there. If you need extra support, simply reach out just like you're doing here.

    One thing is for sure, you never have to pick up a drink in order to cope with anything ever again. Proud of you for your sobriety!
  • Hello @Revdorsey 11 months sober is kicking!! I have found for me, I think it is the addiction trying to stay alive. I sometimes think to myself. Man. A drink or 3 would be nice. I bet my problems would melt away. And the world would be right!!! So i stop. And say. OK. So what is it that I am trying to avoid. Or accept. Because for me to drink. Is to die. Simple as that. I know for a fact, One drink.... and its like lighting a small fire . In a wooded dry area. At first. Maybe ok. But by myself?? that fire would get out of control very quickly. I could not stop it. So let say I just dont start it at all. Safer that way. Hang tight. It will pass. Drink if you choose. But I say we wait a few days first. Good luck!!!!
  • @Revdorsey I concur with @Tommy completely. I'll call special attention to his comment regarding the false notion that a few drinks will melt the problem away. Maybe for a little while you won't care about the problems, but they will be staring you right in the face whenever you get sober. You gotta look those issues in the face and wrestle with the porcupines, and gorillas, and alligators, and whatever else (like the dreaded porcu-rilla-gator, found all over, but mostly in the state of De Nile) eventually.

    Also @dominica had some great advice about finding a support network and using that to help you through the tough times. Whether that network is here, at the gym, at the park playing chess, wherever you find good constructive activities that add to your life, circle them around yourself.

    But, you already knew all that since you have been doing this for 11 months, and that is AWESOME!

    Keep the faith!
  • @Revdorsey... Congrats on your 11 months of sobriety, my friend. That's a fabulous accomplishment and I'm proud of you for deciding to improve your life. You should be very proud, too.

    Just remember: Nothing is permanent. No matter how bad or good a situation is, it will change. That's just life. And @Leaker is right... Drinking might get rid of your problems temporarily, but when you sober up they'll still be there. And you'll feel worse than you did before you drank.

    We're here to help and support you however we can. Lean on us anytime you feel the need.
  • @Revdorsey Hey there! How are you doing today?
  • Let us know how things are going, @Revdorsey. We're here and we care.
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