Triggers

Hi Everyone,

As I journey through recovery, I have given much thought to what triggers me to drink. Before now, I didn't see the connection.

Yesterday I had a particularly "trigger filled" day. I started keeping a journal that both helps me think things through as well as a list of identified triggers.

Here are a few:

1) Talking with my family. I live on the West Coast, they all live on the East Coast. Each has their own sets of drama and back biting. I listen and internalize everything. I have a pretty heavy backpack right now :)

2) A lack of schedule. I like a routine. Some days, my meetings will be canceled and I am left with too much time on my hands. "Idle hands...." I am going to come up with some kind of contingency planning should my schedule be changed.

I am also working on better communication with my husband about drinking. He asked on Sunday if I would like a cocktail. I stated, "No, thank you. I am really trying hard at keeping sober. Drinking isn't fun anymore." His answer, "You just need self control." I left it at that. I didn't feel like discussing.

Thanks for reading. I am going to continue to pay attention to my triggers.

Liz27
  • 6 Commentsby Likes|Date
  • Good on you for taking a look at those triggers @Liz27 and starting to see how you react to different things. For item one, remember what alcohol would do for any of those problems. Nothing. No matter what drama is going on, you drinking isn't going to help anyone, and the clearer you are able to think, the better you will be able to help. Or, thinking clearly might help just figuring out what needs to be in your backpack, and what doesn't need to go in there.

    Schedules and routines are good, but they aren't perfect. For instance, "instead of drinking, I'll go for a walk" is great, until it is raining, or your legs are sore, or some other reason puts you right back staring at the bottle and 3 free hours. Multiple back-up plans are better, and ones that you can execute no matter how you are feeling. Thinks that you genuinely enjoy are better than things that are good for you, at least at the start. "Instead of drinking, I will focus on learning another language", sounds great, but if you don't feel like conjugating into the past indicative possessive, it isn't going to be an effective alternative.

    For the husband thing, wow. That's kinda like someone saying they have a peanut allergy, and getting the response, "You just need to build up a tolerance". Sounds like he needs to come to terms that one of his drinking buddies is gone. But, that's a touchy subject and I am sure it will remain irritating to you for a while until that communication come together. Sorry.

    You are starting to put some thought into you and your addiction, and that is great start. You are seeing that it is tough, but also hopefully seeing that it isn't impossible. The more you dig through your life and addiction with honesty, the better prepared you will be to defeat the addiction.

    Keep the faith!
  • I'm super impressed that you've started keeping a journal to help you think things through and keep track of your triggers, @Liz27! What a great tool for your recovery tool box!

    It sounds like you're doing a lot of soul searching, and that's a wonderful thing. I also hope you and your husband can get on the same page as far as your desire to stay sober goes. His asking you if you want a cocktail was pretty insensitive. Hopefully he will eventually "get" it.

    We're here for you. And we're all rooting for you. Never forget that. Keep working hard at sobriety and know that I, for one, am incredibly proud of you!
  • @Liz27 Hey there. Glad to read this update and I'm super glad that you're gaining insight and taking action regarding your triggers. You've already gotten some excellent insight and advice from @Leaker and @DeanD . I also hope that your husband can support you in your sobriety. You may have to make the request for his support, and set that boundary with him.

    So proud of you and again, thank you for sharing here in the Forum.
  • Happy Friday, @Liz27! I hope things are going well for you. :)
  • Thank you @DeanD !

    I feel pretty positive today. I am heading to the gym for a great workout and keeping busy on this Friday.

    Thank you for checking in on me :)

    Liz27

  • Have a great workout and a great weekend, @Liz27!
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