New to recovery

JoshuaShea

Hi @StephChas Have you looked into an intensive outpatient program? Those are usually only a few hours a day and are a nice alternative for people who don't have the means or opportunity for inpatient treatment. If you're looking for something to do while you wait, try writing your life story. I had to do it at both rehabs I went to and an intense therapy group I was part of. When you start to write down your life story and your addiction played a part, it will start to open up parts of your mind and you'll remember things that you haven't in a long time. I'm now more than 5 years sober and I know being forced to write my story helped. It was only 12-13 pages each time, but it's a lot to go through as you're writing. Good luck

zozzie

Hey @StephChas, don't worry, you've already done a huge portion of the hard work. Here's the thing, it's moment by moment, day by day... one minute you'll be saying to yourself that you're so glad you're free of it, and an hour later you'll literally be calling someone to ask if you can meet for a drink. Don't worry, it's a work of progress. A work of art, in fact. Because the rest of your life depends on it, and you've got the power to paint whatever you wish out of it.
You'll need to rant, rave, and you'll be frustrated. You'll even lash out at those that try to help, but remember, it's all part of the process, and you'll be fine. None of this confusion will matter when you're sober... unless you slip up and have to go through it all again (it's yuk, but it happens to the best of us)
Always pop in here for chats, venting, whatever you need. We're always here, you'll find a good bunch of folks.
Is there any way of supplementing your progress with therapy of some kind?? it can help.

dominica

@StephChas hello and welcome. glad you're here. the others have given some great advice... check into intensive outpatient or outpatient treatment. also, there are support groups ranging from AA to SMART Recovery to Celebrate Recovery (usually in churches)....

We are def here for you to lean on... and we believe in you!!!

change does take time... dig deep...educate yourself on recovery...and come here as often as you like...

dominica

@StephChas hey there! thinking of you today and hope you have a great day!

StephChas

Thank you all! I am now 1 week sober. I'm struggling today. I'm sitting in my office crying. I have an appointment on Thursday with a counselor. I'm feeling very depressed and anxious today. I felt GREAT yesterday! I know this roller coaster will eventually end, but it is so hard! It took everything I had not to stop for something this morning, and I can't stop thinking about wanting a drink! I appreciate having this outlet until I can get the help I need. I found a SMART group, but they didn't meet yesterday because it was a holiday. I haven't been to an AA meeting yet, but there is one at noon today. I just may go. I feel a bit crazy today! I have such a supportive fiance and friends. I'm doing this for me, but I don't want to let them down. Thank you again!

StephChas

It seems my subconscious kept me from going to the meeting today. It was a noon, but, I had it in my head that I needed to leave at noon. There is one after work that I may attend. I'm worried that AA isn't for me, but I won't know unless I try.

DeanD

@StephChas... Welcome to the community, my dear. I'm so glad you found us and decided to join us.

You've already gotten some terrific words of wisdom from several folks. I will just add that I think @JoshuaShea's suggestion of an IOP (intensive outpatient program) is a great one. Also, if meetings are hard for you to get to, what about trying online meetings? There are TONS of online meetings available at the In the Rooms website. Here's the link: https://www.intherooms.com

Just remember: There is no one-size-fits-all path when it comes to recovery. You have to figure out what works best for you and go with it. Also, please know that we are here for you. For help, support, or just to listen to you vent. We're a caring group and you are safe here. So take advantage of us whenever you feel the need.

I'm sending you soooooo much hope and encouragement. You can do this. I know you can. And we will help however we can.

dominica

@StephChas hey there. congrats on 1 week! that's great. sorry today is a struggle. remember it does take time for your brain to make some adjustments...re-wiring and such. the longer you can abstain, the less of a pull you'll feel. (esp. when in distress mode).

you might like AA!! i've met wonderful people in support groups. some are not-so-great... but i simply don't take it personal. but truly i think support groups can be wonderful for some people....

maybe listen to some podcasts or youtube videos too... even 5 or 10 min a day can help keep recovery in the forefront of your mind.

glad you are here.. come here as often as you need!

StephChas

thank you both! @DeanD I have been looking for something like this regarding the online meetings. I appreciate the link! You guys have helped a lot today.

DeanD

You are very welcome, @StephChas!

StephChas

Thank you all. Today feels like a much better day. Thank you for helping me through yesterday.

DeanD

I'm sooooo glad to hear that today is a better day for you, @StephChas! You were able to work through yesterday, and that's a wonderful thing. Good for you!

We're always here for you. Remember that. If you ever need to lean on us, don't hesitate to do so. That's why we're here.

Congrats on Day 8!