psychopathic behaviour

I recently met a child that is coming to me for therapy and the family are beside themselves with worry because there daughter is doing things that are  not normal. She cuts her things, draws dark make up onto her dolls and she writes death threats onto glass and mirrors. The family could not understand why she is like this and yes it is a little dangerous but she can be helped. The problem is that she is reaching out because her father is verbally abusive towards her mom and he plays mind games with the children which in turn will make them act out and it will also lead them towards other things one day, like drugs this is how troubled kids start and it ends with recovery for addiction if they are lucky to get there. So look after your children and ensure that you give them a balanced life with a good foundation.
  • 16 Commentsby Likes|Date
  • @survived i'm super glad to hear that the child is getting therapy...yes, she can be helped and yes, it is important that parents do their best to give their children a safe and loving home...
    thanks for sharing!
  • Children are greatly affected by what goes on in their family life. You need to raise them up and not talk down to them. It is sad that she is living that way but I am glad that she is now in therapy. At least now she has a chance at a much better future then she would have been without help. I wish her all the best.
  • Terrible... As soon as I read the third line, even after having read that her family are "beside themselves with worry", I knew there was abuse in the home.

    How many parents mess up when it comes to a nurturing environment and then bundle the kid off to a shrink or councilling when it comes back to bite them in the form of schoolyard bullying, vandalism, drug taking, self harm. 
    All these "problem child" issues are brought about by the parents.  Maybe they should have had a round table at home and put the blame on the father before trying to make this child feel abnormal and unstable.
  • When things like this are occurring, I'm not sure that it does anybody any good to start playing the blame game, and the most important thing is to try and get the child to open up and get to the bottom of the behaviour.

    Once the reason is out there, that's when action should be taken to decide what then happens in the future regarding the reason, and if the family need to be looked at.
  • Parents should have a round table discussion with their kids and they should be allowed to speak without feeling that they will be punished for it, kids are what parents raise them to be and every child needs a foundation and a grown up to be a role model.
  • We're still here saying "try to get the child to open up"..... the child HAS obviously opened up, or someone has, and we are SURE that the issue is not coming FROM the child. She now needs to heal, and be reassured, let know that it's not her fault.

    Her parents, on the other hand, need to be dealt with. Letting this behaviour contniue... well, we don't have to point that out, do we. 

    Why is the emphasis on "try to get the child to", when the issue at hand is clearly abuse in the household. 
    A little like victim blaming, dontcha think?
  • Good that she's in therapy, but this story has all the hallmarks of domestic abuse which is really sad. Give it time, and I really hope she will learn to stray away from psychopathic behavior and retain a better relationship and influence with a from her parents.
  • yes that is true I cant give out too much information but the daughter is the product of an unhappy marriage and the parents are to blame for her behaviour because at the med of the day adults are the role models for kids and they look up to us to lead the way, not the other way round and we should love them and make them feel that they are loved it is a simple thing to do really.
  • Her father should also undergo therapy. She wouldn't be in such a situation if her father did not abuse her, her siblings, and her mother in the first place. I just hope that the rest of the family is undergoing counselling and therapy as well. 
  • The onus is on the father to man up. The mother to woman up and set things straight in the house. They are the adults, after all. This poor girl is obviously going to be scarred. 
    We tend to try to pressure kids today to fit in, be normal, be happy, be lively..... and we ignore the reasons why they may not want to just "be happy". 
    I know, I'm ranting, but doesn't anyone else get tired of seeing this behaviour. Most addicts or mentally ill people are in some way damaged children. Why do we al blame ourselves and feel ostracized for what actually was brought about by the actions of another.
  • Thanks for sharing. That sounds terrible. I'd like to ask why child protection services isn't intervening in cases like this one. I understand it's still not extreme enough but really this is the subtle but long term type of treatment that turns children into troubled adults is it not? The worst part about it is that once she is an adult she will most likely pass on this trait to a new generation because of this.
  • Is there anybody else on this thread that's feeling a bit apprehensive that a lot of people are saying it's definitely domestic abuse without hearing about the full characteristics of the child, and more importantly the full history of the parents involved.

    In cases like this I know it's hard, but jumping to conclusions isn't going to help anybody concerned.
  • Apprehensive, yes, but there is no doubt that those people, myself included, are acting on the following text in the OP 

    "The problem is that she is reaching out because her father is verbally abusive towards her mom and he plays mind games with the children which in turn will make them act out and it will also lead them towards other things one day"

    Can't really spell it out more clearly, can she? What other choice do we have in this situation??? demonise the child until we are sure that she isn't just being a little bitch?? That's a little extreme, isn't it? She obviously needs help.

    domestic abuse doesn't have to be physical violence, and emotional abuse can be much more damaging.
  • Did I say that the child is just being a little bitch, or say that we should demonize her? I don't think we should be demonizing or judging anybody as we only know what little we was told in the OP.

    Telling the father he just needs to 'man up' isn't exactly the best form of advice either. Growing up I suffered bothered physical and emotional abuse so I'm only too well aware what the term domestic abuse covers, but until I know the full facts I'll say the child needs help, I'm not going to say the parents need to publicly flogged, jailed and the key thrown away though, as I, along with everyone else apart from those involved know the full story.
  • I never put words in anyone's mouth, and I am only giving my insight on what I see described in front of me.As any of us can do.

    We're not going to have any more information, as the OP said it was delicate to go into details, but it was definitely mentioned that there was abuse in the home. When an adult abuses a weaker person, a woman, a child, I am sorry, it becomes less about their personal struggle and more about that of the victims. I will never see it another way.

    "get the child to open up" could, at this stage, mean pushing her to explore avenues that she already has analysed to death, and could be blaming herself for. It could mean that she's already opened up and pushing further could harm her until she is ready. I just take what the OP mentioned and draw a conclusion from that.

    Nobody mentioned public flogging or jailing, but the change in behaviour must be brought about from the parents first. We cannot just weekly or monthly tell the child to chin up, try this, try that, and then send her back into an abusive household and expect a positive result. 
    We CAN, however, expect the parents to change their behaviour and start being more attentive to the needs of everyone in the household, and not just the father's abusive whims.
Sign In or Register to comment.