What Sobriety has brought me so Far

I'm writing this post 3 1/2 weeks in to sobriety . I think it helps me to reflect on what I've gained so far . And I hope the new folks who I read almost daily can take some gain from knowing what they can look forward to if they can just make it through the earliest days of withdrawl .

The first advantage has come to how I feel in the mornings . I have worn a CPAP machine for years . I used to cough until I came close to / or did vomit almost every morning. I blamed this on CPAP . Now , I wake up , eat breakfast ( which I could never stomach when drinking ) , shower , have clear thoughts , and don't cough or vomit .

The second advantage has been a new found enjoyment of family time . I've always loved my family , but time with them was time I couldn't drink . I now have a new passion for events where my kids are doing their thing and showcasing their talents . Addiction had robbed me of "Real Time " fun .

There are numerous other advantages , but the last I will mention is money . I have done the math , and on beer and related activities , I have already saved over $100 per week . With my oldest a year away from college that adds up quick .

3 1/2 weeks is not a tremendous victory . But , if I can focus on the positives , perhaps I can stay away from the negatives .

I thank everyone on this site who has supported me and so many others . It's a great forum to just be able to drop into to keep me honest !

  • 53 Commentsby Likes|Date
  • @TWSJ... Thanks for this amazing, inspiring update! And I happen to disagree with you. I think that 3.5 weeks IS a tremendous victory. You have made amazing progress, and every day that you are sober is a victory. I'm so proud of you!

    Keep doing the next right thing, my friend. You are an inspiration and you are discovering the things--both little and big--that make sobriety a wonderful thing. I am so happy for you!!

    Peace and hugs. :)
  • Really happy to read what you wrote. I'm really glad things are working out and don't forget if you are feeling good now just imagine what you will feel like a year from now.
  • @TWSJ hey there! congrats on 3.5 weeks sober! that's fantastic! i'm so proud of you!

    thanks also for sharing what you've learned and what you're enjoying now. that totally inspires others!

    so glad your health is improving too..and relationships and finances. that's all pretty phenomenol!

    keep going! you're rocking it!
  • @TWSJ 3 1/2 weeks, nice. Congratulations! It's strange you say that about the coughing and gagging with the inability to eat breakfast. I do that too. Just never attributed it to drinking. Hopefully it'll stop here too. Thanks for giving me something else to look forward to.
  • First of all CONGRATS! Keep it up and the mindset you now hold. I am happy for you, I truely am this post made my day that much better in all honesty. I think what you are doing is a great idea in listing down the positive and how you are spending your time with your family. I believe you are on the right track in recovery. If you ever feel like going back just reread these posts that you made and all the reasons you don't want to do that. You have my full support and I am cheering you all the way from over here. Take care always and GOD bless.
  • Hey there @TWSJ! You are doing great. Not many people can get past 3 1/2 weeks so you are definitely making great progress. Keep at it. You're in the right track. Before you know it, years have already passed and you've already become the best version of yourself yet. Best of luck!
  • Thanks for sharing this with us. I am glad you are able to appreciate the positive side of staying sober and I am sure it will only help you continue on with your journey. I am sure your family appreciates it too and hopefully your relationship with them only gets stronger from here. Keep up the good work and I hope to hear more updates from you.
  • Staying sober for 3 1/2 weeks is no mean feat. So in my book, that's a big accomplishment.  I'm really glad that you're able to pull through this long. Keep it up. :)
  • I spent Thursday-Saturday with my oldest friend (and drinking buddy ) at his home in another town . While he was drunk and stoned every night , I had told him weeks ago that I was going sober , and he put no pressure on me to partake . Instead , he asked me to drive everywhere .

    Being with him in that condition did not give me any urges . On the contrary , it opened my eyes to what many others may have seen in me for so long . His young son was around most of the time we were together . Yet I think his son is getting to the age that he realizes the difference in dad in the morning and dad in the evening . I know my kids did eventually .

    I am only just over a month sober now , and he has seen me in worse condition than I saw him this weekend . I don't want to be hypocritical , but it was difficult to resist the urge to tell him he needs to straighten up , at least around his kid . And I subscribe to the theory that "Only I can change ME " .

    In addition to being a lifelong friend , he and I own a small business together . Now that I'm sober , I can see how booze and marijuana is screwing up his thinking and productivity . I promised myself I wouldn't become a preaching ex-drunk , because I know some of those guys , and have seen how it can get under your skin . But , he really doesn't have anyone else to call his bluff .

    Thanks for all the support . Positive vibes !

     

  • @TWSJ... Sometimes an experience like you went through over the weekend can truly be eye-opening. I'm glad that being with your friend had a positive effect on you. Be very proud of your 1 month of sobriety. It's a great achievement. And I think it's very possible for you to sit down and talk to your friend about his situation without being preachy. There's never anything wrong with a good ol' heart-to-heart conversation with a friend.

    Keep doing the next right thing, my friend. I'm glad you're here and on the right path. :)
  • This is my first post on this site TWSJ, You will learn in time that 3 and 1/2 weeks is a long time. With that being said it does not matter if  you have 3 weeks or 30 years sober..... WE ALL are given this gift of sobriety one day at a time. Every morning that I wake up with out a hang over or in a cell......is a good day. I start every day by asking my higher power ( that I chose to call God) to walk with me and to help guide me through the day. For today, do not take that first drink, and try to do something for those who are still sick and suffering in and out of the rooms.
  • 12stepin,

    Thank you for the comments . And God is my higher power as well . I do not go to 12 step programs , but not for religious purposes . I use this site as my meetings , and you will find a very welcoming and supportive group here.

  • @12stepin... Welcome to the community, my friend. I look forward to seeing you around the various discussions here. :)
  • @TWSJ
    I understand your situation with your friend and business partner. I've been sober about a year now and I have a very close friend that had helped me out quit a few times that is now in the position I was about a year ago. This friend had helped me out with money, work, and even with telling me my drinking had become a problem. He recently quit his job to go on vacation for a month came back with no job lined up and couldn't get his job back. Now he spends every day drinking round his apartment and smoking pot, with no money coming in. Recently he tried to get his old job back many times with no success. With all this said I was feeling the same way you were. So another friend of mine and I went to talk to him. So far things are still going well.

    I found that it's best if you talk with others in this situation more like the friend you are, rather than preaching. Simply start out by saying you're concerned and doing this while they're sober is best. I found that sometimes simply suggestion to cut back and let them see how it is makes things easier. Essentially just do your best to be there for your friend.
  • Moose91,

    Thanks for the advice and catchy handle . I have been called Moose most of my life .

  • @Moose91 My best friend did exactly that with me she gently told me she was concerned and suggested I cut down she used the money angle and never said I should stop completely - I have to say this planted a seed and when I had what could have been a very dangerous tumble down the stairs and saw my daughters reaction that planted seed was watered to the point where 4 days ago (mothers day in the UK) i decided to admit my problem and do something - being non judgemental is key too I think because whenever I felt judges about my drinking it put my hackles up!!! Good luck 
  • Angie ,

    Thanks for the comment and congratulations on 4 days ! Best of luck !

  • So happy to read this post!  It reminds me to my daily dairy entry, it helps so much to write this kind of things, because it helps you reflect on your life.  Good for you for practicing this kind of thing, it wasn't until recently that I realized how useful it is to do this :) 
  • Seraphine ,

    Thanks . Tomorrow is 5 weeks . I comment on a lot of other peoples posts as well as reflecting on my own positives . I think it helps me , and hopefully others to talk about the past , recognize the benefits of today , and have optimistic thoughts about the future .

    In the past , I quit drinking many times . I never reached out to anyone other than my loving wife . I always tried to keep my problem ; even when on the wagon , to myself . Subsequently , I always left the door open the falling back into the trap . Sharing with this group was a good start for me towards accountability . Even though there is a high level of anonymity . I have this time around begun to tell my closest friends why I'm not drinking with them . And I hope this is a trend I will ultimately be comfortable sharing with more casual friends . Coming clean so to speak .

     I have also been genuinely happier being sober this time around . Hopefully , happiness will keep me straight this time !

       

  • what a great thread here....so happy that folks are getting so much out of this forum and the amazing people here...also happy that many are getting and staying clean and sober...learning lots of valuable lessons along the way...

    i think we are all precious...each and every one of us, no matter what our past has been like...or what our present is like....and it is my hope that we can all welcome each other with love and acceptance on this life journey...because every single person matters.....and we are not alone. 


  • @TWSJ... Five weeks is totally badass! Congratulations!! Just keep going, my friend!

    Proud of you!! :)
  • I'm adding my congrats too @TWSJ. You sound so energetic and excited to be different from your old self and your energy is highly contagious. You got some really great things going on and I encourage you to keep on pushing each day. Waking up without a hangover and not feeling sick to your stomach is a wonderful prize for quitting the bottle. I applaud you tenfold my friend.
  • You may not think that 3 1/2 weeks is a victory, but it certainly is in my book. Thinking back to how I felt when I was in your position, those 3 1/2 weeks mean everything. This is the amount of time you've been sober and that in itself is an accomplishment. If you are remaining sober, then you should always feel accomplished. Congratulations!
  • Good job! It is true that life gets a lot better during and after recovery, and most of the struggles and shackles of addiction are being crushed. You are able to do a lot of things you couldn't because drugs were holding you back, and you can finally enjoy a sober life. Congratulations on your victory!
  • Hello there, it's good to know you're defeating your addiction habit by believing in yourself. This is true strength and hopefully you'll keep inspiring others to quit alcohol addiction.
  • I'm happy to hear about the progress you've made in just 3 1/2 weeks. You're already feeling better, and that shows you that your efforts are more than worthwhile. Keep up the good work, and stay the course. I hope to hear more good news coming from you! 
  • Alex_Dees82 ,

    Thanks for the comment . I'm actually about to turn 7 weeks and getting happier by the day !

  • Congratulations on the three weeks. The mornings are always better sober. I can certainly relate to finding enjoyment in other things when sober. You begin to realize there are other avenues that bring enjoyment to you in life. I'm glad to hear you are finding that out, especially with family time.
  • So yesterday marked 7 weeks . This morning , ironically at 8:30 a.m. I had my first real craving . I went Turkey Hunting with one of my buddies . Leave the house at 5:30 , nice long walk through the woods , light rain keeping it fairly cool but inhibiting the birds I think . All in all a good start to the day .

    This buddy is a pretty regular drinker , but we have spent a good bit of time around each since I quit and he knows the deal . No judgement on either end , and we have a bunch of mutual hobbies so he's my regular go to guy .

    We get back to the truck around 8:30 , and he says " Worked up a sweat on the walk , think I'll grab a beer ". He knew better than to offer me one , but I was thinking I damn sure wanted one .We drive out of the club and 2 miles down I said I wanted to pull into the quick mart and grab a coke , he said yeah he wanted another beer >  I really thought his beer looked tastier than my coke .

    I don't judge my buddy for drinking at 8:30 . Not long ago fishing or hunting always meant an early start for me as well . And I don't consider my craving a setback as I didn't act on it . He probably would have questioned my weakness if I did . Next time I will have a NA beer in the cooler to ward off the taste craving .

    Happy Easter Friends ! And Happy Sober Sunday to those who don't celebrate Easter ! 


  • @TWSJ... It's only natural to get cravings. The important thing is that you got one and dealt with it. Congratulations on that accomplishment!!

    I also want to say that I'm super impressed and proud of you for your 7 weeks of sobriety. You're doing wonderful things, and you are an inspiration to others, for sure. I'm so grateful that you're a part of this community!!

    Keep doing the next right thing!  :)
  • Thank @DeanD . Obviously I come here a lot . That is what keeps me honest .  I've found of from past failures , not talking about it leaves the door open for me to sneak back in . And helping other newbies feels good too .

    I see "Administrator" in you and @Dominica's profiles . I take that to mean you guys are the watchdogs or guardian angel's so to speak . If that is the case , I want to give you both a shout out . This site obviously means a lot to a bunch of folks in need . Thanks again for all you do .

  • Thanks for the love, @TWSJ. :)

    I hope we can continue to keep you honest. :)
  • How are you nowadays? Your story felt really motivating since I've been struggling for the past couple of weeks. I hope I can get back on track and feel inspired again, I know how hard it gets sometimes! Props for 7 weeks, amazingly done!
  • @Shammy ,
    I'm good . I'm sorry you are struggling . Are you still sober and just down ? Keep in mind , sober or not , not everyday is going to be perfect . And there are a whole bunch of us here that have had down days . Give us a shout anytime you need an ear , or in our cyberworld , an eye . I check in several times a day and would love to do anything I can to help you get inspired again . 
  • @Shammy... I, too, am sorry that you're struggling. We're here for you, my friend. You can get back on track again, and we'll help you any way we can. Sending you positive vibes!
  • Cutting down on the intake of alcohol voluntarily surely helps physically, but that's not even the best perk you get. Your thoughts also change... you become wiser and start to appreciate life's little pleasures more. I'm so glad you managed to do it! Hopefully you'll not relapse, but don't think about that. Think about what productivity you can opt out for today. :)
  • I just want to say to those that are here on their first or second day...as @DeanD and @dominica get thanked for their hard work, kind words and facilitation of these threads (and I also thank both of you), I owe thanks to @TWSJ and @zozzie among others for helping me on my journey...14 days sober today, and every day they contact me to see how I'm doing. I couldn't have done it without them. Now it's my turn to help out, and as we all move through this we pull others up out of the dark. If I was ever unsure whether people could truly be kind and selfless, it's been proven beyond a doubt here. So my message to anyone out there reading this, unsure of what to say - just say hi. If you don't get a response, say it again until one of us spots you. You won't regret it!! 
  • @functional ,

    I'm touched by your kind words , but I'm just an old drunk trying to make friends . A lot of people help themselves by helping others . You are  about to be there to . I'm glad you mentioned the "Keep posting to new guys " . I worry that some folks think we are more of an internet hotline and leave if they don't get an immediate response . The new ones are just as important as those of us who have made lasting connections .

    So happy you are still with us . 14 days is awesome !

  • @functional kudos to you for your sobriety!! :) so glad you are here!!

    stick around and journey with us for the long haul!
  • @functional... 14 days is AMAZING!! Congratulations! I'm super proud of you, my friend! Just keep trying to do the next right thing. And remember we're here for you.

    P.S. Thanks for the kind words, too! :)
  • @TWSJ
    Thanks for providing your story. I have tried to stop drinking several times and been unsuccessful but reading about how your life has improved gives me hope. I suffer from depression so it can be easy to forget the good things. Thanks you're an inspiration!!!
  • @PixiePoo ,

    Well , this is an older post . Tomorrow will be 11 weeks for me, and I could list numerous more benefits to my new sober life at this time . But , I would rather have you ask me for any support I can give you to get to the same place . Coming here and making new friends of like mind has been the biggest help . I came here on day 1 . I had failed in the past by trying to keep it all inside me . Even though there is an anonymous aspect here , I still feel like these people , my new friends ,  give me a level of accountability . Keep coming here . Every time you have an urge , write us your thoughts instead of picking up the bottle . It's worked for me . I want you to find happiness . We all do !

  • I am so happy for you! When you become sober and beat the urge to drink, so many doors open up and its an amazing feeling! Good job and keep going!
  • I'm glad you are doing better and thanks for continuing to update us with your experiences as I'm sure it can serve as great inspiration for many others who might be going through the same thing. It's not easy giving up a bad habit and it's even more difficult to stay strong while still having people around who partake, so hopefully this will serve as proof that it can be done.
  • This post is very encouraging. One day at a time. I'm only coming up on a week or so without a drink. I can see how money can be saved though. Hopefully, I can make it through the rest of this year and beyond. Just have to stay positive  and busy.
  • @Tata ,

    I'm actually finding it easier everyday . Thanks !

    @lovelifelive ,

    I originally posted this over 2 months ago . I can tell you honestly , I am even happier now than I was then . However , I would like to be totally honest about the $ part . I have started some new "Clean living " hobbies and been far more generous with my children of late . So I have not become an overnight millionaire . You will find as you get farther along in sobriety , that there are plenty of other things to spend the $ on , they just have more positive results . I would suggest throw all of the extra $ in a retirement account before you get too used to having it in your pocket .

    And my friend , "Only a week or so " without a drink is a hell of a lot better than 2 weeks drunk . So be proud of yourself . I'm proud of you !

  • Congrats on your sobriety thus far and I hope that you continue down this road. It is not an easy one, but it is well worth it. You get to see the world with a new set of eyes and it is amazing. 
  • Thanks @sillylucy , I think I will continue down this road . I find myself not making Mountains out of mole hills , not dwelling on negatives , and feeling better physically . Why in the hell would I want to go back to the other side ? No , I think I want to stay this way .

    And may I say , I hope your life continues in a wonderful direction . After all , some people think of "Silly " as being synonymous with "Happy ". Stay Silly my friend !

  • @LoveLifeLive... Congrats on your week of sobriety! That's awesome! And never classify sober time as "only." You can't have 2 weeks without 1 week, ya know? 

    Just keep going.
  • I am really inspired by this post. I have not been able to get o far but I hope I will get to two weeks some day. I will try my best to continue my sobriety. Thanks for the post.
  • @recovererno66 ,

    Check out my more recent "3 months tomorrow" Post . You can get there my friend . I know from experience that's easier said than done . But you can do it . Come here every time you need to express a feeling . Positive or negative . We like to hear it all . This site saved my life . Let it save yours !

  • Thank you for sharing this nice post and congratulated to you for your good job. Keep this independent in yourself in everytime. "there's will there's way" 
  • Three and a half weeks IS quite a long time, especially for an addict getting sober!
    Congratulations!
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