My Prayer Helps Me

Hello everyone, I have posted only once before on the recovery.org forums, and that was a long time ago, but I was thinking I wanted to talk about faith and recovery tonight. Since I last talked with you, I joined a church. Well, I didn't become a member, but I started going to their services. I started to pray a lot, and use meditative prayer. I started to pray not only for myself, but for others. I was persistent in my prayers. In prayer, I asked my higher power for strength regarding my alcoholism and addiction. I asked for strength about all sorts of addictions I have had, including to excessive spending and food. When I spent a lot of time each day in prayer, I could notice that there was a dramatic difference. AA stresses reliance upon a "higher power" -- but I find that I call him God away from rehab and meetings. I find a peace within myself when I am talking to God and sense that he is talking back to me. It is the peace I feel knowing that I have no "sin" -- of believing that someone greater than myself has rescued me, and that as long as I love this God, I will never have to fear anything at all. But I find that my spirituality pulls me away from rehab and meetings. There are many people who just go to NA or AA meetings, and do not have a religion or personal faith to draw upon. I am obsessed with the idea of total recovery -- of never having to worry about a drop of alcohol, ever again, or a snort of cocaine or whatever other substance I might have used in the past. I reflect upon my life and how there has been drug and alcohol use, pain, life traumas, and emotional crises. I tell myself to let go of these memories and not judge myself, but rather look up to my higher power and look to the future, that is -- one without fear, one without any worries, one without the pain I have ever felt in the past, and one without any of the problems I experienced while in such turmoil. Yes, I have been rescued. Although I have to say that I did a part of the rescuing. Yes, my prayer helps me.
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  • @StrengthBringsHope hello! glad you are back and thanks for sharing! i think that's wonderful that you have found a new faith in a higher power... there are many paths to recovery, so whatever works for you is wonderful!

    i tend to think prayer and faith make a difference as well. quiet time whether it's in meditation or prayer...in gratitude...it can certainly help!

    so glad you are back here and you're doing well.
  • Thank you for sharing your story with us @StrengthBringsHope! I actually love your story because it's very different from mine. Although I do have faith in God, I tend to disregard Him at times. It is such an inspiration to read a story like yours because it is a story of success because of your faith in a higher power. Not a lot of people believe in God or in a higher power and it can be intimidating sharing your beliefs when you know other people will make fun of you.

    I go to church as well, not every week, but every time I can. I do know that's not the proper way of seeking His guidance. But I'm trying very hard to change that. Aside from that, I am trying to incorporate Him more into my life. Not just in moments of success, but also in moments of pain and suffering which can be hard to do. 

    I want total recovery as well... A point in my life where cravings cease to exist. But I know that without a higher power, that won't be possible. Hopefully, we can get through this, with a little more faith and love in our hearts.

    Take care always!
  • @StrengthBringsHope... Good to see you again! Thanks so much for your post. I'm in total agreement with the title of this thread. My prayer definitely helps me, too. 
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