Will I Ever Forgive Myself for What I Did While Addicted?

You’ve heard it before, forgiving someone else is more for you than the other person, because letting go of ill feelings, resentment, or that feeling that you have been wronged is truly transformational. But, let’s flip the cards and talk about forgiving ourselves. 

Addiction is a disease that takes over your mind, your body, and your spirit, and let’s face it, we’ve done some things we aren’t proud of during our time spent trapped within addiction. You probably wronged others, maybe even those you care about most, and you most certainly wronged yourself in many ways. 

Here’s the thing – you chose to get help and fight for recovery. Part of recovery means making amends, and part of making amends means forgiving yourself. If no one ever did anything wrong in the world, oh what a place it would be! But that’s not reality, you did some things wrong, you made some decisions that weren’t commendable. But now you’ve made the most commendable decision there is, choosing recovery. 
 
So, go ahead, forgive yourself, you deserve it. Your loved ones are all cheering your recovery on and so are we, so move further into your recovery and forgive yourself, you’ll be glad you did. 

It may not happen overnight or within a few days but allow yourself to move through the process of forgiveness in your own time. Address the things you feel guilty about, the things you feel ashamed of, the anger, resentment, or other negative feelings you have and then let them go. They belong in the past with addiction which you’ve chosen to leave behind. 

When you let these feelings go, don’t look back, just keep moving forward and building a strong foundation for your lifelong recovery. 

Reference
N.D. “How and Why Addicts Should Forgive Themselves”. Recovery Ranch. (Website). November 2014

  • 6 Commentsby Likes|Date
  • Forgiving one's self is perhaps the biggest act of love a person can partake in. We are so hard on ourselves, especially in the aftermath of difficult and trying situations. But we're all human. And none of us are perfect. We need to love ourselves first and foremost. And that includes forgiving ourselves, too.

    Thanks for this post, @FriendlyAdvice. :)
  • I agree. It was tough to forgive myself and sometimes guilt will try to creep in.... but I do my best to keep it at bay. Forgiveness is such an amazing thing... can open doors to freedom on so many levels.

    If you carry around so much guilt.... reach out for help. You don't have to live in that prison... YOU have they key to unlock that prison... but you may need some locating it...

    There are some great books out there on self-forgiveness... self-love... worthiness. Journey toward your own love.... and until you can find and really snuggle up with yourself, we'll love you in the meantime :) We will be the mirror that reflects your beauty...and worthiness

    no matter what you've done :) 
  • I am 51 and just made a scene in a Mexican restaurant. I am an alcoholic but visiting out of state with my parents and my oldest son. I am physically sober here but not mentally. I ordered a corona with dinner. Mom starts out with you notice you are the only one who ordered alcohol. I said ok...I will leave and walked out for a while. It got ugly after that. I was selfish and I am licking my wounds and am trying to get a flight to head back home asap. I dont know exactly what response mom thought she would get by pointing out the obvious. Maybe that I would say oh yea and order a coke. I am ashamed of who I am and of how I hurt them. Her pointing it out is not a good way. Because of my behavior I have lost adult rights in their home. Unfortunately I will keep away from them for good. I dont need constant reminders on the past, present or future. Sober or not.
  • Of course my parents want the best for me, I know that. I scrutinise myself enough. Im not strong enough to have them do it too without feeling defensive and self loathing. So...you would think I would do everything to prevent it. I might but being alone...away from normal people seems to be a better route to avoid pressure and embarrasment.
  • I'm feeling really guilty right now. I feel so guilty. Its weighing me down...
  • @omalleytac... Sending you much positive energy. Please don't be too hard on yourself.
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