Happy Friday....What's going on?

The weekend is just about here! Yay! Happiest Friday to everyone!

Wondering how ya'll plan on showing yourself and your loved ones some big love and nurturing and kindness this weekend!! :)

Anyone needing support?
  • 31 Commentsby Likes|Date
  • Work :( night shift.... 9th and 10th shifts in a row
  • I typed a big post and it will only post the first sentence
  • @dominica I plan on finishing the "revamping" of my bedroom this weekend!! I have two pieces of furniture I want to paint but those may be saved for a Spring project, I'm still debating. It's gonna be cold this weekend (or my version of cold ha ha) so I would have to leave my bedroom windows open.... haven't decided yet. I'll be watching the UGA vs Auburn game Saturday .... GO DAWGS!!
  • I started my weekend this morning by helping my wife babysit a friend's 6-month-old daughter. My wife went to the coffee shop to knit this morning (as she does every morning), came back home, and said, "I have a surprise for you." That surprise was baby Betsy. We watched her for about three hours and it was glorious. We absolutely love babysitting little ones! We always watch our 18-month-old neighbor boy, too. They are our surrogate grand children!! Not sure what the rest of the weekend will consist of, but I hope there are more babies involved!
  • That sounds awesome @DeanD !! I love little see ones! I hope to someday, if my life ever calms down, to volunteer in a preemie ward to hold and help take care of babies. Today I am making ham and bean soup. Not the kind with 10 different beans. I make mine with ham, potatoes, carrots, cut green beans, and then plop in homemade spoon-size dumplings. Everyone loves it and I usually have Italian bread with it too. No football this weekend since the Steelers game was last night! Great game! How about them Steelers! I'm hoping to maybe go to the theater tomorrow for a good movie since it is cold and rainy all weekend. Glad you enjoyed the baby!
  • That soup sounds amaaaaazing, @tiredmom!!! Enjoy it! And have a GREAT weekend!!!

    P.S. I'm happy for your Steelers. Unfortunately, I've lived my entire life in the land of the Detroit Lions. :'(
  • @Drained1 sounds like a great weekend. cooler here too...yay! go auburn?? lol are they the dawgs?

    @tiredmom that dinner sounds AMAZING!! WOW! and i'm a steelers fan too, growing up on PA :) enjoy!!

    @Vicbrenan bum about the night shifts..... and not sure why won't post... darn techy stuff!! hope you can enjoy your work and weekend!

    @DeanD awesome... little ones are so full of life....love. what a blessing. and i'm impressed your wife knits! :)

    i''m awaiting my first grandbaby still. false alarm last night, but they say could be within 24-48 hours.... we're excited! :)

    blessings to all!
  • @dominica ooooohh that's so exciting! I'm envious. New grand babies are wonderful!
  • @dominica that is super exciting! I hope the baby comes soon
  • Broncos fan here.... my son is named Peyton
  • @dominica congrats on your first grandchild arriving soon! Super exciting :smile:
    @DeanD babysitting is always fun. I played with my grand-daughters while my son and his girlfriend made their dinner after work. Best part of my day seeing their smiles.
    @Vicbrenan UGH sorry you have to work. I am working probably both weekend mornings. Hopefully not more than four hours each.
    @tiredmom I'm a Pats fan, ha one of the Boston crazy sports fanatics LOL I don't watch basketball though. Only football, baseball & hockey.
    After work Saturday I am cleaning my room because it is a pit and washing my kitchen floor. I don't think I would ever get a white floor again. It looks fabulous with the dark cabinets until it gets walked on.
    Sunday I have to think of something to make for dinner, I'm tired of the same old thing
  • I wish it would let me post my replies!
  • @Vicbrenan make sure your cursed is at the bottom before hitting post. Try that maybe.
  • @Vicbrenan are you on mobile or tablet? not sure if that's messing with it... maybe try logging out and logging back in? hmmmm. let us know ....

    @mammakim oooh, let us know whatcha wanna cook for dinner... i'm into trying out healthier cooking options....i have a pinterest board, which helps me remember that there are more meals than my "go-tos" that i make all the time. lol
  • To @dominica since you posted the initial post of what's going on this weekend. And to anyone else who cares, lol. I am getting ready to go out to dinner for a big fat steak with my husband, sister and brother-in -law. I don't care what my son does while I am out. I'm going to shut off my phone and enjoy myself and give myself some much needed relax time!!
  • @tiredmom Hey there! That sounds like a wonderful way to enjoy dinner with your husband and family! Good for you for practicing self-care and treating yourself to something great! I hope it went well!
  • Thanks @dominica I did enjoy my dinner and the company of my sister. It was very nice. I came home after dinner and my son was home, but apparently got a hold of something (drug) while I was out. He had been clean all week but then yesterday used. Was probably heroin but a very small amount because he wasn't bouncing off the walls. My husband and I could tell in the first second we saw him. Of course we said to him, we can see you are on something, but we didn't yell and scream and make a big deal about it. We just went in the family room and spent time together watching tv. My son would come in the room every once in awhile and want a hug from me. Geez! I think he is getting to a place in his addiction where he is starting to feel guilty when he uses. Lately it seems like he is clean about 5 days, then uses. He keeps repeating this cycle. But last night I decided I was just going to continue to do my own things. I am pretty sure he was bored because he went to his nice friends house and he wasn't home, so because there was nothing else to do, he went to the drug using friends. He keeps saying he is getting better and honestly he is nowhere near as bad as he was a year ago. So I really don't know what to do at this point. I'm hoping that eventually he will get it. If not my goal is to put him out when the weather is warm again, but in the meantime I will just try to support him as best I can.
  • @tiredmom I'm glad that you enjoyed your dinner and your evening. I think that's great that you went about your own business and let your son be as he was. I'm glad that he's doing better than he was a year ago. I know when I was reading that Beyond Addiction book, there were a lot of helpful tidbits on how to best support someone who is trying. It sounds as if he is trying, but continues to relapse. Change definitely time and is Progressive. So we'll continue to pray that he progresses in a good way.

    This reminds me of something in the 20 minutes guide:

    "Acting on your emotions by breaking down, confronting, or detaching is counter-productive in many ways. Let us count them: 1) you ultimately feel worse (for losing control, for saying things you regret); 2) you help your child divert attention from their actions by making you the problem (“my mom’s crazy,” “she always overreacts”); 3) your child may cope with the negative feelings brought on by the situation by turning to substances more (this is not to blame you for your child’s behavior, but to help you do everything you can to remove yourself as her excuse); 4) a truth about motivation: confrontation leads to resistance and your child’s motivation is likely to drop; and 5) as your relationship deteriorates due to conflict or detachment, so does your positive influence.

    The alternative to acting on your negative feelings is to manage them and find ways to be calm and non-confrontational. Engaging with your child in this way does not mean you are passively accepting risky behavior; it means your child will more likely hear what you think about the behavior and, more important, about healthier ways to behave. Staying connected in a calmer way also lets her know you care (whatever she says in the heat of the moment, trust that she cares that you care) and are prepared to stay the course. Not least, you will be modeling the behavior you want to see from your child.

    Easier said than done, right?"

    But you are doing this!
  • Thanks @dominca That was very helpful. I did start reading the beyond addiction book, but am still at the beginning of it, as I read and then reread so it sinks in. Lol. I appreciate your taking the time to type all that. It definitely makes sense. I'm getting better at staying calm but I think some of it has to do with how bad he is reacting. For instance, if he is bouncing off the walls, my anxiety gets pretty bad and being near him and watching the extreme behavior is like fingernails down a blackboard! But I am definitely getting better with my own reaction. My biggest problem is as I'm getting older, I like quiet. The quieter the better. I'm going to keep reading and am hoping once I get through all the fall cleanup and leaf raking, I am going to find a Nar anon meeting. Thanks again.
  • @tiredmom... I'm so proud of you for the progress you're making. And it's great that you were able to go out for a nice dinner on Saturday night. Self-care rules!!!

    Happy Monday! I hope you have a terrific week!
  • @tiredmom Oh I hear you on the wanting and needing quiet. I've actually grown to love silence. So I could totally understand how that would get under one's skin.

    I enjoyed nar-anon when i went. It helps balance me out emotionally and it gave me a chance to support others.
  • Thanks @DeanD I did enjoy my dinner and we were initially going out for steak. You will be really proud me because not only did I treat myself to steak, but I ordered lobster too. LOL @dominica Years ago I went to a few Nar anon meetings but at the time I thought these people must be crazy, because I couldn't understand what it had to do with me. I think I was looking for someone to tell me how to make my son Stop, and just wasn't getting it! But now I get it !
  • @tiredmom that's like the time when i got into this toxic relationship and i was a hot emotional mess....had no idea how to manage my emotions b/c i stuffed them my whole life...and for the first time, i just couldn't.... like, i literally couldn't!!!

    and my partner at the time, who was in NA, says, "maybe you should go to Nar-Anon"... and i was soooooooooo mad about this, thinking there was NO WAY i needed to go to a meeting where everyone was boo-hooing...

    but you know what? that's exactly what i needed. lol and i finally did go and glad about that!
  • @tiredmom... I think that's a common misconception some people have about groups like Nar-Anon and Al-Anon. I think some people go to those meetings thinking they're going to get the magic cure for their loved one. But, alas...that's not what it's all about. It's about helping YOU, not them. (And besides, we all know that there's no magic cure!)

    Also...Mmmmmmmmmmmm. Lobster. AND steak. Lucky you!!!! :)
  • @dominica I have a pinterest too. I add millions of recipes but haven't experimented too much. I also have craft items and decorating ideas. I should make it my goal to try a couple pins a month.
    @tiredmom jealous of the lobsters, I haven't had one in a long time. I hope you enjoyed it.
  • @mammakim yes, pinterest is so cool.... i'm trying new recipes these days too :)
  • @mammakim I love lobster and could eat it every day if it weren't so darn expensive. I took a vacation to Maine once and the lobster was really cheap since its available right there. I ate it every day for a week. Lobster everything! Lol
  • @dominica I pin the recipes and have tried a few. Winter is coming so maybe I can enlist my son and his girlfriend to work on a few. Slyly keeping him busy
    @tiredmom Me too, I love lobster. I can't cook it myself though.
  • It's not hard to cook @mammakim. Boil or broil. About right now I would like to broil my son. You know the story where the witch tries to push the boy in the oven! He came home tonight high! He's using about every 5 days now is really pi..ing me off. I didn't freak out. I just said what I thought calmly and he went up to his room and went to sleep. Insanity!
  • Good for you for keeping calm, @tiredmom. I know it's hard. Try to hang in there and keep the faith. <3
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